Scars leave marks that kisses don’t
Close enough to ask favors from but not to check up on
Missing the call back; Is it attention or selectivity I lack
Question my worth to the mark, aching my head to think past my own fault
How did I get here? locked in a pattern
Of abuse and concern
I could let the snake bite kill, take a few moments mere
Or suck the poison out, burn my gums and seer
A wound won’t close overnight, reminders remain in sight
Adult depression something else, independence morphs from freedom to the shadow of responsibility for ourselves.
No one to ease the fears of being alone, confined by hypotheticals created in the skull
Slaving survival, dissatisfied pain lingers dull
Zoning, moaning, groaning, unconscious wishes flow
Open my eyes to the ceiling and sigh, disappointed by the mornings promises and lies
He asked me what’s my meaning; a trick I get to pick but I never asked to be, future fear; what’s ahead unclear
head afloat eyes wide shut with the world at my feet waiting for that careful step
I pick my bones up one by one, flexing exercising power will, armature for what to be done
Hands wet to mold my body like clay to a shape unseen, held together against heat and decay
The outcome is unknown but it’s the only way.
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